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Wednesday, July 08, 2015

My junk mail folder.

I know we all get junk mail but recently I had a look through mine instead of deleting it en mass and it seems that there are a high amount of deaths amongst rich people in Africa.
My friend, well he says he is, George Kiby has $17.5Million belonging to a family who are dead. I can quote eight others with higher amounts but all the people have died. Plane crashes are common so make a note if you visit Africa hire a car, no internal flights.
My junk box at the moment has requests to help move $72 million.
To be fair there was Thelma who had not dollars but sterling and it was here in the UK rather than the bank at Burkina Faso like some of the others. Sadly Thelma`s exclusivity ends there because she sadly is dying. Death and money seem to walk hand in hand through my junk mail box.

The International Monetary Fund (Africa branch) owes me $10m. but I refused it. I am busy fighting my own battle with death and winning so no point importing it amongst some dollar bills.

Now all these shysters trying to get into peoples hearts and bank accounts are bad enough but the one I reproduce below takes the biscuit for bad taste (my opinion). I am far from being a religious person but can imagine a vulnerable person with just their faith to cling to might be taken in and lose what savings they have. Some of these scam letters quote passages from the bible and ask you to read them.
 read Isaiah 41 vs 10.  John 4 vs 14 And Corinthians 1:3-5 

Princess Grace Tina Yak has $5.1M to shift and by coincidence her husband died in a plane crash and the money is in the bank at Burkina Faso. It appears a plane load of millionaires who all banked in Burkina Faso were on the same plane and it crashed, how unlucky is that.

Dear beloved
I greet you with the name in the name of the LORD Almighty the giver of every good thing. Good day and compliments of the seasons, I know it is true that this letter may come to you as a surprise. Nevertheless, I humbly ask you to give me your attention and hear me well, but I implore you to take the time to go through it carefully as the decision you make will go off a long way to determine my future and continued existence. I am Mrs Heidi Hadizan Mariam  aging widow of 57 years old suffering from long time illness. I have some funds I inherited from my late husband, the sum of (9.5 Million Dollars) and I needed a very honest and God fearing  who can withdraw this money then use the funds for Charity works. I WISH TO GIVE THIS FUNDS TO YOU FOR CHARITY WORKS. I found your email address from the internet after honest prayers  to the LORD to bring me a helper and i decided to contact you if you may be willing and interested to handle these trust funds in good faith before anything happens to me.

Having known my condition I decided to donate this money to Churches, organizations or good person that will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct herein. I want you to use this money for Churches, Charity organizations, orphanages, widows and other people that are in need. l took this decision because I don't have any child that will inherit this money . Moreover, my husband relatives are not close to me since I develop a Cancer problem and it had been their wish to see me dead in order to inherit his wealth since we have no Child. These people are not worthy of this inheritance. This is why I am taking this decision.

I want your urgent reply to me so that I will give you the deposit receipt which the COMPANY issued to me as next of kin for immediate transfer of the money to your account in your country, to start the good work of God, I am desperately in keen need of assistance and I have summoned up courage to contact you for this task, you must not fail me and the millions of the poor people in our todays WORLD. This is no stolen money and there are no dangers involved,100% RISK FREE with full legal proof. Please if you would be able to use the funds for the Charity works kindly let me know immediately.I will appreciate your utmost confidentiality and trust in this matter to accomplish my heart desire, as I don't want anything that will jeopardize my last wish. I want you to take 40 percent of the total money for your personal use while 60% of the money will go to charity.I will appreciate your utmost confidentiality and trust in this matter to accomplish my heart desire, as I don't want anything that will jeopardize my last wish. Any delay in your reply may give me room to look for another good person for this same purpose. Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I stated herein. I don't need any telephone communication in this regard because of my ill-health.

Hoping to receive your response soonest at my private email address at: hadizanhm01@voila.fr

Thanks and Remain blessed
Yours Sister in The Lord,
Mrs Heidi Hadizan Mariam.

Back to the nicer things in the junk mail box. Those nice people at Paypal have told me three times my account has been compromised. These e mails have come from three different depts. judging by the different sending addresses. That is customer service and nice to know someone is looking out for me. I just had to sign in and it would all be sorted out. I feel upset after all the trouble they went to but it seems I don`t have a Paypal account.
All is not lost, the Inland Revenue owe me £203.37 and I need only fill in a form with my bank and card details including the security code,  I guess they ask for that with all the crooks about, and the money will come into my bank. They even attached the form how good a service is that.

Amazon say my account has been updated and they want me to sign in and ........update my account. Two wrongs don`t make a right but what do two updates make. Probably a fool.

I recently had a spam comment on the blog that gives a clear picture of what to do with your junk mail. You will find the translation on the very last line.

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Not all e mails are junk because they begin with unusual words like "dearest one" or "loved one".  I had one from a lovely lady that began "Dear Sir" and the rest they say is history.
No forms to fill in or bank details wanted, just some information on single handed boating. 
Best import this country has seen in decades.
    

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NB Valerie & Steam Train by Les Biggs

NB Valerie & Steam Train by Les Biggs